Sick parents

[Bravo]

SEVERAL brothers on here have recently had to deal with sick parents. Some got better, others didn't.

Not sure how much I will go into this publicly, but want to touch base with you guys and see if this is something that there is a desire to discuss more in depth. (and to explain why I was MIA)

Last week my dad asked me to take him to the ER, the instantly admitted him and things got pretty serious. Pneumonia that wasn't responding to treatment, and he ended up getting sent to the ICU.

Things got pretty hairy for a bit.

It was so bad that I was having to help feed him, and take care of everything else because he was so weak and couldnt get out of bed.

Once they dialed in everything, he started getting better, then was released from ICU and I took him home earlier this week. He's doing pretty well now.

But things were VERY serious, and we had to deal with the stuff no one wants to think about.

So- is this something we want to publicly discuss?

It really is something we all need to think about, prepare for, and will one day deal with.

I've talked to some of the guys who have been dealing with this stuff, hope they chime in.

[DJNinja]

I lost my mum last year to cancer.

Agreed that it was hard having to make decisions about final arrangements, but on the bright side, it was taken care of beforehand and not stressfully upon her passing. So I'm grateful for that.

The hardest part was watching her go from her usual awesome vibrant self to the shell of a person she became, knowing that there's really nothing I can do to stop it except to provide the absolute best care I could. Balancing her care (as her primary caregiver) as well going in-field, having a girlfriend, and running a business was also very difficult.

For those guys currently dealing with it, I'm praying for you, I know how difficult things can be, but enjoy the good days and look on the bright side: your family member is still here

[rockstar]

Glad your Dad is doing better, that is really scary. Had to deal with something similiar. Never really got into it on facebook, but will here, because yall are my brothas.

My mom called me, she couldnt breathe. She wanted me to take her to a walk in clinic, I said no, Im calling 911. Ambulance came, took her to the hospital. They had her on oxygen, the whole time. Years and years of smoking damaged her lungs. One night she was very close of going to ICU, to be hooked up to a breathing machine. Scariest night of my life, and hers too. After about three days she started coming around. She is still on limited oxygen, when she needs it, but hers oxygen capacity is getting alot better. She stopped smoking, and is eating healthy.

But, to answer your question, she wants me to be the power of attorney and told me is she is ever hooked up to breathing machines to pull the plug. I told I would respect her wishes, but would be the hardest decision, I ever had to make.

[Jay-T]

My grandmother is dying. She's had emphysema for years and we're in the final stages. She hasn't been able to get out of bed in weeks. It's really tough to see someone you hold in a high regard become a big infant. We have to change her, feed her, make sure she's turned every two hours and take turns talking to her.

It's fucking stressful.

[TowerT]

Thank you all for sharing your experiences. Condolences for those who have passed. Happy to hear others are getting better. Positive thoughts for those who aren't at this time.

My grandparents raised me for a while as a child. Earlier in my life, I had to watch my surrogate parents grow weak. Grandfather was a tall, solid oak of a man, who I still try to model myself after to this day, suffered a stroke and died soon after. He was the last man I'd ever expect that to happen to. Grandmother got lung cancer from smoking and I was, a lot of times, her only visitor to the nursing home/hospice before she passed. She had social anxiety and agoraphobia. It was a sad place to be in.

My mom may have been a lot closer to passing last year than she may have originally let on. Various heart and other organ issues forced her to have major life-saving surgeries that she is still recovering from. She and I didn't have the most solid relationship for years until recently, so a lot of "what if's" crossed my mind during that time. We talk more like adults to each other. It's pretty cool.

After all of that, I soon find out my natural father, who left my life at age 3, passed away a while back. He was not a good man by any means and always meant to confront him about what a bastard he was to me and my family. Opportunity missed to face him down. I didn't have the courage to do it, and I regret it. Not that it would have changed much externally, but I think I would have reclaimed something in my self-confidence if I did.

Later on, same year, my ex-stepfather, the man who stepped in when my father left, also passed away from Parkinson's disease. I had lost contact with him, as well, after my mom left him. Guilt and opportunity missed to truly thank him as a man for stepping up and helping, as much as he could. We didn't have the best of relationships while I was growing up, but I was hoping we might have had something like I have with my mom now.

All these events, but especially the three from this past year, had different effects on me. However, they all reminded me of how precious life is and that time doesn't stand still for anyone.

[Moiser]

After reading the above I felt inclined to share.

Around five weeks ago my older brother was showing symptoms of a stroke, he's 47 years old. After some tests what we initially thought was a stroke looked more likely to be a brain tumour. The initial verdict was that the tumour was likely to be secondary, meaning it had spread from somewhere else in his body.

After a scary couple of weeks and more tests it turned out to be an abscess on his right Temporal Lobe. The swelling in his brain has caused a loss to his speech and communication abilities, to the point where he struggles to communicate.

They operated around three weeks ago and he started on his path to recovery, his speech was improving and it looked like he would be leaving hospital after five weeks in hospital due to the high risk of infection after the procedure. Sadly, three days ago his symptoms returned, after a scan the doctors confirmed he would need a second operation, which he had two days ago.

At this stage it's impossible to tell if he'll make a full recovery, crazy how things can change so quickly. For me it's proved to be another example of how life should not be taken for granted and that time really is the most precious thing we have. I've spent most of my free time visiting him and trying to support his wife.

[Farmer]

My Mother is currently going through chemo. Been a roller coaster ride the past few months.

Was extremely lucky to catch it. Its normally undetectable and very aggressive, but luckily a kidney stone sent her to the ER, which showed a suspicious cyst, but still nothing to be alarmed about. They decided to go through with surgery anyway, and much to their surprise, actually found this kind of cancer.

Pretty sure they got it all, but having to go through the chemo anyway as a precaution, and seeing her go through it is rough. It's especially rough on her, since her only brother passed away from cancer just 6 months ago.

Then there were complications related to the initial surgery, which hospitalized her 3 more times. The last time she stayed for 13 days, and things got pretty rough there a few times before they finally figured out what was wrong and fixed it.

It's def given us a new perspective on things. Luckily it looks like Mom will pull through from this, but the time she spent in the hospital, and the time between when we learned she had cancer and when we learned that they thought they got it all were both particularly scary times.

But it has given us a whole lot to think about, and I believe everything is going to be more positive the rest of our lives after having gone through this, since she's going to pull through.

And, I leaned a lot on Bravo and Maestro for emotional support when we first found out. Very thankful to have those guys in my life!

[Kid Brock]

I found out around Thanksgiving of 2012 that my father has Pulmonary Fibrosis. My stepmother found out because she found some of his medication she was not familiar with.

I did not know what it was at first, but soon found out it is basically scarring of lung tissue. There is no cure and the best that can be done, is try and slow it down as much as possible.


My father is hardheaded and kept smoking even though he knew it will make things worse quicker. I was able to stay for 3 weeks this Christmas with he and my stepmother. It sucks seing him withering away. Very skinny, needs oxygen bottles to get enough oxygen, no endurance, it really sucks and is heart breaking to witness.

1 week after my Christmas visit this year, he was admitted to the emergency room after falling 2 times and not being able to get up. The accident ended up being because of 2 prescribed drugs he took together. That did scare him enough to stop smoking at least.

His doctor does not think he has more than 1 year left, so I will be going back home very often this year.

[thelocal]

Lost my father in 2012 due to a few things

He came in form offshore,feeling bad so we brung him to er..they ran all kind of blood test etc,said "oh he just has the flu"..turns out he had staff and they "lost" our number to call us and the nurse lived just a few feet from us..so we go home

3 days pass he get VERY ILL we bring him back..turns out he had staff in the blood and was going septic

from there it was a downward hill..he caught all kind of sickness and virus from the hospital itself..he had 10 doctors,all working on him at once and none of them could figure out what was truly wrong

flown to supposedly the number 1 hospital the southern region..but they couldn't do anything,just soak up there paycheck

in the end he couldnt heal because of diabetes(thats a big killer)

some thing i have to say from my experience and at the time my dad was in the hospital,there was ALOT of just unexplainable cases in that hospital..makes you wonder what is going on

One my dad got on the vent to help breath..it was way downhill..

in this whole 3 month battle of being in icu,he flat lined a few times

i would always get a second opinion from here on out

its heartbreaking...but i suppose its also a hard lesson in life (for me at least)

after that experince..it makes me hate the medical field,and hate they make so much money

my dad bills came over to almost 2million,thank god for insuurance

[TowerT]

Lost my father in 2012 due to a few things

He came in form offshore,feeling bad so we brung him to er..they ran all kind of blood test etc,said "oh he just has the flu"..turns out he had staff and they "lost" our number to call us and the nurse lived just a few feet from us..so we go home

3 days pass he get VERY ILL we bring him back..turns out he had staff in the blood and was going septic

from there it was a downward hill..he caught all kind of sickness and virus from the hospital itself..he had 10 doctors,all working on him at once and none of them could figure out what was truly wrong

flown to supposedly the number 1 hospital the southern region..but they couldn't do anything,just soak up there paycheck

in the end he couldnt heal because of diabetes(thats a big killer)

some thing i have to say from my experience and at the time my dad was in the hospital,there was ALOT of just unexplainable cases in that hospital..makes you wonder what is going on

One my dad got on the vent to help breath..it was way downhill..

in this whole 3 month battle of being in icu,he flat lined a few times

i would always get a second opinion from here on out

its heartbreaking...but i suppose its also a hard lesson in life (for me at least)

after that experince..it makes me hate the medical field,and hate they make so much money

my dad bills came over to almost 2million,thank god for insuurance

Sorry for your loss. As "advanced" as our health care (supposedly) is in this decade, tragedies like this just boggle my mind.