bond_james wrote:Thanks for the help guys.
I definitely need to approach girls more often.
The pof thing is getting a little sparce. Winnipeg is a 700,000 person fishbowl. And only so many of the girls are online.
I think I'd like to make her a primary, but I still don't want to put in too much relationship effort. Thinking back though, I don't think she really wants someone around all the time either. It's more for what her married friends will think.... Lol
I like the "this is my fun life come join me if you want" frame. I've kinda been acting like this, but I should make it very clear.
As for not telling her about the lay, I should have. Might have changed the tone so she would be more open to an open relationship cause she'd see I am living it already.
Not sure how to bring this up again though without it being awkward or hurting her.
700,000 population is a lot... just did a search of pof and there's tons of girls... some guys live in towns where there's 10-20 girls on pof... = you're either need more help with online game, or this is a limiting belief
I didn't consider making my fb a primary until 8 months in - not sure how long you and girl have been going out but yea, I would wait for that discussion, or seed it for future. My fb is essentially my primary and there is little to none relationship effort... b/c we get along so great, naturally it's easy and fun
Also, yes at some point you may have to vocalize it (for you maybe sooner than later), but it also helps if you are living it. So, one thing to tell a girl you're awesome. Another to actually BE awesome.
Going forward, you can do a couple things:
1. You can not say anything and see if she brings it up, and you already know what you're going to say and be chill with it
2. Next time you guys hang out, you can check in with her - so last time we talked, seemed kinda heavy. wanted to make sure we were all good. then see if she brings it up.
If she does, then have convo
If she doesn't, then you decide whether you want to casually lead in and mention this... want her to be cool and this is what you're about. Be ready to risk walking away on this one if you decide to have this convo.
If she doesn't, and you decide not too, then vibe it out and have lots of fun fucking til she brings it up again. And when she does, you can tease her, omg you are totally the DTR girl! (Bay)
And, with what she tells her friends (at the end of the day, it's you two vs. the world so as long as you're happy it shouldn't matter). BUT to give her something to say, cuz she will need to.... she can tell her that she is seeing someone, he's great in bed, big dick, love threesomes, when are they coming over for one, etc etc as long as she makes you look good! Also, helps with fun/joking frame, but she gets your intention.
)
