Tagged: connection

So you are like Hitch?

Ya….kind of……but I don’t teach guys to lie!

This is the first question I get as soon as I respond to the old “so what do you do for work?”

-and what my GF gets from all of her friends and co-workers as soon as she tries to explain my job to them.

It’s their only taste of this world besides the dating advice columns in magazines and all of those books like THE RULES but….most don’t take those things seriously.

They never got so depressed staring at the ceiling each night from bed, a bed they sleep in alone, wondering what’s wrong with them and why they don’t have to balls to talk to girls (and then google how to get help).

But I digress-

They like Will Smith (I’m still pissed about I AM LEGEND), he does have some great quotes about life and seems like a solid dude…so I will let it slide. Anyways Hitch was a big movie and even if they didn’t watch it they have at least heard of it.

-Word is they are actually turning this movie into a TV show, CNN LINK

So I wanted to cover a few of the big issues I had with HITCH

 

#1 ALWAYS be honest!!!

 

The movie starts off with him setting up a scenario where he lures away a woman’s dog, gives it to a client who then sets up an elaborate ruse where he can act like he almost died trying to rescue it.

What a great way to start things off with the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with!

I am honest, to a fault. (don’t ask me if jeans make you look fat unless you want the truth). I always tell my guys to be honest with women, and EVERYONE in their life.

-eg. Never lie to a woman about your sexual intentions? There are PLENTY of women who are down for the same!

 

So how was HITCH teaching guys to lie?

As soon as he starts doing his RECON work for his client’s “mark” he is:

A. Being creepy as shit

B. Gathering INTEL to help his customer create a fake identity with whom the “target” will then helplessly fall in love with.

-The problem with wearing a mask, is eventually it has to come off.

Days, weeks, months, YEARS later….the truth is going to come out and she is going to be mad/hurt, and she has every right to be.

You should never have to LIE to anyone, if they don’t accept you and your terms, keep looking until you find someone who does.

 

I, on the other hand, prefer to teach men how to be the BEST VERSION OF THEMSELVES. 

What does that actually mean?

It means teaching my guys to live up to their FULL POTENTIAL. To not allow something stupid like limiting self beliefs or 1 person’s negative opinion from years ago, to control the direction of your life!

Guys like me needed to have a paradigm shift and understand that this IS something that we can control, something we can work on and actually get better at, and THEN how to do so.

 

#2 Don’t chase that one girl!!!

 

I have gotten this question more times than I can even try to count, thru email, Facebook, in person, and on phone coaching calls.

“So there is this one girl…”

As SOON as I hear this, I know I am dealing with an AFC.

Thinking about “this one girl” at work, who works at someplace you frequent, or from your past- who has NEVER shown you even an ounce of attraction and probably doesn’t even know you are alive- well bad news, obsessing over “THIS ONE GIRL” is closer to stalking than love, on the relationship spectrum.

 

Guys need to learn that women aren’t beautiful butterflies.

 

Well they are human beings for one, but something that will help guys understand this is the Butterfly/Moth analogy.

Any guy who runs outside with his net, trying to catch “this one” perfect butterfly will always be disappointed.

Instead you need to understand that women are more like moths, and YOU are the bright light that attracts them. Then YOU chose the one(s) you want. The bigger and brighter you are, the more that you attract, and the more choices you have.

 

Then you find women who are legitimately attracted to YOU for being YOU!

 

Now I know this idea might be almost impossible for an AFC to comprehend, but there are TONS of guys on my forum who have learned this, and will tell you first hand that it works.

I am currently in the BEST relationship of my life, living with my GF and this is how I “got her.”

I was awesome, she realized how awesome I am (and vice versa) and we both know how fortunate we are to have found each other.

No trickery, no lies, no pretending to be something each other is not. No con-games set up to trick her to fall for me. No gimmicks or manufactured scenarios to push her into my arms.

Which ultimately is the lesson that Pick Up tries to teach guys, that so many fail to even get close to understanding (even guys who teach this stuff).

The purpose of Pick Up is to level yourself up, to become cooler than you ever thought possible, to become the man that WOMEN WANT TO BE AROUND, and then be able to actually build a honest and deep connection with another human being, in any possible location in a short timeframe.

Once you have the skills to do that…life gets pretty awesome.